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Relationships can be difficult and require a lot of work. All couples often go through periods of conflict due to lack of proper communication. When this happens, it can seem like you’re completely disconnected or living a completely different life. You may also feel like you are constantly arguing and resenting each other. It can make your partner (or partner) feel like they don’t care about you, which can really hurt. Maybe when you’re in the “honeymoon phase” you start to feel the same things you did at the beginning of your relationship. But you and your partner have changed so much that you know people you never knew. You want to improve your relationship, but you don’t know where to start.
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The hallmark of a successful relationship is working together to overcome challenges. Problems arise when you and your partner try to resolve conflict and withdraw, refuse to communicate, and become enemies.
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When you go through a period of conflict in your relationship, it can make you negative and hostile towards your partners. When this happens, it can be assumed that they will hurt or hurt you. Then you will argue with them and get upset. This creates a vicious cycle of hostility that is difficult to break without external support. This can cause you to feel “stuck” or “held hostage” in your relationship. And this can lead to injury and pain, which can lead to resentment towards your partner.
But you don’t have to be “stuck” in your relationship. It is possible to repair damage and get out of negative patterns of relationships with partners. Couples therapy can help you heal the damage and move forward positively. Our couples therapists are trained to help people at any stage of their lives with all types of relationships. So whether you’re dating, cohabiting, married or divorcing, we can help. Additionally, we want you to know that our Bay Area counseling center is a safe place for LGBTQIA+ and minority individuals and couples to seek support.
Our couples therapists are trained in the proven Gottman method of couples therapy. An important component of the Gottman Method is the assessment that you and your partner(s) make at the beginning of counseling. This assessment will help you and your therapist identify the strengths and weaknesses of your relationship. Your therapist will then work with you to develop a treatment plan to address your strengths and concerns. Your therapist will work with you and your partners to address three key factors: building friendships, managing conflict, and building shared meaning. It helps to replace negative behavior and interaction patterns with positive ones. You work to heal past hurts in order to move forward with a shared goal of having a healthy relationship full of intimacy, positive communication, and connection.
In our consulting practice, we often work with other therapists who specialize in helping clients with other mental health issues. This collaborative approach helps our clients address multiple concerns simultaneously. For example, if a partner is neurodiverse and/or has ADHD, they may struggle to maintain a healthy relationship. Their ADHD can manifest as a lack of attention or affection towards their partners, which can lead to conflict. In this case, we work to help each partner understand the other’s point of view and communicate their needs and desires effectively. We educate couples about how ADHD symptoms can manifest in relationships. Often, this knowledge reduces the blame game in the relationship.
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To do this, we often use a therapy technique called doubling, developed by Dan Wiley, founder of Collaborative Couples Therapy. In this technique, the therapist enters your double and speaks as you. They set a good example for each other. By learning how to have a difficult conversation, you will be able to address not only the issues that brought you to therapy, but also the issues that will inevitably arise in your future life.
Additionally, at California Integrative Counseling, it is very important to us that you feel that you have a role in the treatment you receive. That’s why we want you to work with us. We want you to take ownership of your treatment because it will help you be more invested in your success and improving your relationship with your partner.
Ultimately, we believe that everyone deserves to find happiness and satisfaction in a long-term relationship. Our goal in couples therapy is to create space for you to work on the most intimate relationships in your life so that you feel whole, loved, and supported.
Our San Francisco counseling clinic is proud to serve couples and lovers in all types of relationships. Our therapists are specially trained to help LGBTQ couples and individuals in alternative relationships. So we understand the unique challenges they face in their lives and relationships. The main bolts of LGBTQ relationships are the same. Same-sex couples, extended families, or extended families struggle with the same issues that couples in traditional relationships struggle with, only they can be viewed from a slightly different angle. For example, “communicating with in-laws” or “using personal leisure time” may be more closely translated as “How we ‘do’ with family and friends” or “using personal leisure time” may be translated into discussion. Alternatives to Monogamy Discussions around economics can challenge fundamental differences or traditional gender roles.
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The techniques for learning these conversations are no different than working with couples in heteronormative relationships, but it is important to have a therapist who understands these nuances and the unique challenges LGBTQIA+ couples face. This gives couples more room to talk about their specific perspectives on the issue without having to educate their therapist, such as how there are many different ways to “come out” in your community.
LGBTQIA+ and alternative relationships also bring many wonderful strengths to their relationships. Often times, experiencing discrimination, challenging gender roles, and self-exploration bring strengths to a relationship that may not be present in a traditional heterosexual relationship. These families deserve therapists who recognize these strengths and can validate what they are doing as well as help them through their struggles.
At our consulting center in San Francisco, California, you and your partners can get the support you need. Our therapists have worked with countless partners to build trust and connection in their relationships, and we’re proud to do the same for you. Plus, if it fits you and your partner’s schedules, we offer online therapy! If you’re ready to take the steps to begin couples therapy, schedule a free 20-minute phone consultation with us.
We understand that asking for help and starting treatment can be scary, so we encourage you to take the opportunity to see what’s available. You’ll find empathy and support when you work with professional counselors in person or online at our Bay Area treatment practice. We know life can throw you some surprises, so if you’re not sure how to navigate big life changes, we’ve got life transition advice. Additionally, we specialize in helping adults with ADHD. If you would like to know more about our counseling center and our services such as adolescent therapy and career counseling, please contact us. Pittsburgh Counseling and Wellness Center welcomes all genders and sexual orientations. We have always prided ourselves on celebrating diversity, inclusion and unity. We believe the LGBTQIA community deserves support and validation of their identity and meaningful access to mental health support and resources.
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In LGBTQ therapy, clients can talk confidentially with therapists who are familiar with the issues faced by people of different sexualities and genders. We highlight sociocultural factors that play a role in internalizing, reacting to, and coping with various stressors and traumatic events. Our LGBTQ therapists believe that clinical therapy is beneficial not only for those experiencing adversity, but also for the purpose of self-exploration and growth.
Our LGBTQ therapists have worked with a variety of client groups, including couples or trios who are part of the LGBTQ, kink and poly communities, and people in “non-traditional” relationships. We also help transgender people seeking hormone therapy and gender confirmation surgery, and provide non-judgmental support to clients with gender identity and expression. We strive to create a supportive and caring environment where clients feel comfortable working together and creating a safe space
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